Easy

Time passes softly without you

And I don't know who I am

Or how I got here

Or why I alone am so easy to lose.

Baptism

I have found myself changed

Born again in your love

And now without you I wonder

Who the fuck have I become?

Ready

If my heart were ready to find

Maybe you would have heard it

Beating for you

You would have felt it skip

When you walked in the room.

Time

I have time to waste
Until the final taste
I might as well waste it
With you.
So much time to waste
Years that I could be alone
Reading and writing
Philosophizing
Or
Snuggling deep into you.

Strangers with Benefits

Public indecency
In a snow covered car
Hot August nights
Heating up the stars
And in the Fall
We fell together
Crashing into walls.

What if
What if you never kiss me again?

What if
What if we're not even friends?

Drunken disorderly
Flirting at the bar
After party games
I'm clearly all yours
And in the end
We fall together
Landing wherever.

What if
What if I never kiss you again?

What if
What if this is the end?

We talk like long acquaintances
How's your kid and how's your job?
I think that's all we'll ever be,
A respite from feeling lonely.
What if that is all we'll ever be?
Strangers with benefits.

Best Part of Waking Up

Every morning for breakfast

I eat disappointment-oh's

With almond milk and sugar

I gulp it down so violently.

You came out of nowhere

Those burning eyes, that long hair

Muscular thighs, now I don't care

About breakfast anymore.

The most important meal of the day

The most important meal of the day

The most important meal of the day

Is you.

Your gold flecked eyes

Your way with lies

You are the prize

In every box of cereal

Cheap and easy

Mostly sleazy

The best part of waking up

Isn't coffee.

Pleasure

Aftershocks of pleasure

Like I need the reminder

Of a one time, sometime

Casual experience.

You go home to a shared

Intimacy of lies.

I stay here with all my

Unspoken goodbyes.

You are nothing to me,

The pleasure is fading.

You told me your name

Walking out the door.

I'm still there somehow

On my living room floor.

Idiot

You want a 

Fated

Destiny driven

Meet Cute moment

Everytime.

No effort or planning.

Just chance.

You're an idiot.

It Felt Like

Every time you touched me
It felt like something more
Than just wonton avarice.
It felt like emotion.
Like you were searching for
Something deep inside of me
(So careful, so kind).
But in the end
(Because this is the end)
It was all nothing.
We are nothing.

Saturday, 4 A.M.

It's 4 A.M. on a Saturday,
Obviously I'm drunk.
That doesn't mean I like you
Any less.

I'm texting you because
You never text me first,
And at 4 A.M. I'm drunk
And hopeful.

But I'm getting nowhere,
You barely text back.
You can only think to ask
"Are you drunk?"

Well if I wasn't drunk
Then I'd want to be,
Your response isn't inspiring.
I give up.

Eyes Shut

Don't tell me what you think I want to hear

Tell me everything you hope, you hate, you fear

I want to crawl inside and analyze

On top, jaw drop, all lies stop

You can be my salvation

Dirty little desecration

Soul rotting desiccation

I'll sew your eyes shut to any other kind of love.

Shit Head

Never had much luck
With men named Matt
Last one told me he liked
That I didn't have a cat
What kind of fucking shit head
Says a thing like that?

First time I got drunk
I was fingered by a Matt
His nails were too long
And after all of that
Sobering hanky panky
It hurt when I sat.

My first crush was
A boy named Matt
Pummeling him lovingly
With my stuffed cat
I should've known by his whines
That's not where love was at.

A rose by any other name...
Well, it's not a fucking Matt.

Dirty Talk

Pretty boy, you're throwing joy
Around like birthday confetti.
You are marmalade in my mouth
Too sweet to eat every day.
You are a house full of Xmas lights
And I can't wait to turn you on
Then take you down and
Put you in a box in the attic.
You always say such pretty words
To me and all the other girls
But I can't give you any dirty talk
My hips say more than my lips can
And yours isn't the biggest cock,
But it really has grown on me.

Pretty boy, the lights are low
The music is jumping in my chest.
You are the brightest thing in the room
Looking directly at you hurts.
And the feel of you so soft against me
Saying such pretty dirty nothings
Nothing I haven't heard before
But still quite fun to hear in the moment.
You are a ball pit and a bouncy house,
So much fun if only I were younger
But I am a shark tank full of hunger
And you are bleeding every time.
You know I won't do dirty talk,
When you are dirty poetry.

Lover Think

Lover think
I'll have another drink
And wait for you to see
How drunk I need to be
With you.

Ah.

Sucking at your mettle
Your marrow
This is just an extension
Of my personality
Freeform jazz
Playing through my tongue
You can't even articulate
Comprehend
Inhumanity in my pose
I just have to laugh
At the way you scrunch
Your nose.
Mouths are the masters
Of men in repose.

Blackberry Indifference

If I could bottle the moment I fell
Out of love with your skinny lovely soul
I bet it would taste like blackberry wine
And indifference.
How fickle I must be to let
All of your adoring toothy smiles
Trickle through my fingers like diamonds
While clinging to my rhinestones.

What This Is

There is something about sharing the same skin
That feels like
Something.
I don't have a word for it yet
But it feels like
You're mine and you're me
And my dreams are in your head
And there's a right kind of wrong to us
That feels like
Something.
But this is not about love.
I don't know what this is.

Nothing

There are words
And attraction
And eyes that speak louder
And hips that collide
With precision
And lips that meet and bruise
With intent
But I feel nothing
And the words pass through me
And I see nothing in those eyes
I feel nothing from those careful hands
So softly pleading for release
Because I feel nothing.

Any

Though so pretty in the breaking
You are a broken creature
So desperate for the taking
And you name her like a prayer
(sad, oft spoken)
The key to all your aching.

Just the sound of it.

Any
One will do
Now.

Fever bright and without decorum
You chase something familiar
(Any, any, any)
One to curl into.
(Any, any, any)
One to hold you tight.
(Any, any, any)
One to forget that prayer.

Just the sound of it.

Eyes of Fate

Change is all around
And I don't like the sound
My conscience makes when
Our lips meet and mate
And you look at me like I'm your fate.

Couldn't we just cuddle?